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Pasangan tengah memadu kasih (Foto: Lactobacto.com)
Pasangan tengah memadu kasih (Foto: Lactobacto.com)

Hukum Nikah Beda Agama

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IslamLib – Memilih pasangan hidup makin tak mungkin dibatasi sekat geografis, etnis, warna kulit, bahkan agama. Jika dahulu orang-orang di Indonesia menikah dengan orang yang paling jauh beda kabupaten, sekarang sudah kerap dengan orang beda provinsi bahkan negara.

Dahulu, biasanya orang menikah dengan yang satu etnis, kini menikah dengan yang beda etnis sudah jamak terjadi. Orang Jawa tak masalah menikah dengan orang Minang. Orang Sunda pun tak pantang menikah dengan orang Bugis. Tak sedikit orang berkulit sawo matang menikah dengan yang berkulit putih, juga hitam. Orang Arab menikah dengan yang non-Arab. Bule Amerika menikah dengan perempuan Batak.

Pernikahan beda agama pun tak terhindarkan. Globalisasi meniscayakan perjumpaan tak hanya terjadi antar orang-orang yang satu agama, melainkan juga yang beda agama. Tunas cinta bisa bersemi di kantor-kantor modern yang dihuni para karyawan beragam agama.

Ruang-ruang publik seperti mall, kafe, dan lain-lain membuat perjumpaan kian tak tersekat agama. Sekat primordial agama terus lumer dan luluh diterjang media sosial seperti facebook dan twitter. Orang tua tak mungkin membatasi agar anaknya hanya bergaul dengan yang segama.

Mengahadapi kenyataan itu, para agamawan memiliki pandangan berbeda. Ada yang bersikukuh bahwa pernikahan beda agama tak direstusi Tuhan. Sebab, agama dirinya adalah terang, sementara agama orang lain adalah gelap. Terang dan gelap tak mungkin dipersatukan dalam satu ikatan perkawinan.

Para agamawan yang galau ini coba menepiskan fakta, dan terus merujuk Sabda bahwa nikah beda agama adalah haram. Menurut mereka, bukan hukum Tuhan yang harus disesuaikan dengan kenyataan, tapi kenyataan lah yang harus ditundukkan pada kehendak harafiah teks Qur’an. Analogi yang sering disampaikan, bukan kepala yang harus dicocokkan dengan ukuran kopiah, tapi peci lah yang mesti mengikuti besar-kecilnya kepala.

Ada juga agamawan yang pasrah pada kenyataan. Menurut mereka, nikah beda agama tak mungkin untuk dilawan. Agama tak boleh mengharamkan begitu saja. Sebab manusia bebas dalam memilih agama, maka ia juga bebas menentukan pilihan pasangan dalam keluarga.

”Dalam dunia yang terus mengarah pada kesederajatan agama-agama, kita tak mungkin memandang agama orang lain sebagai gelap”, tandas mereka. Dengan demikian, menurut mereka, agama harus terus ditafsirkan untuk diadaptasikan dengan kondisi zaman yang selalu berubah.

Agumen Teologis Islam. Tentang nikah beda agama, para ulama Islam terbelah ke dalam tiga kelompok. Pertama, ulama yang mengharamkan secara mutlak. Dasarnya adalah al-Qur’an (al-Baqarah [2]: 221) yang mengharamkan orang Islam menikah dengan laki-laki dan perempuan musyrik. Juga, QS al-Mumtahanah [60]: 10 yang melarang orang Islam menikah dengan orang kafir.

Sementara QS, al-Ma’idah ayat 5 yang membolehkan laki-laki Muslim menikah dengan perempuan Ahli Kitab, menurut kelompok ini, sudah dibatalkan dua ayat sebelumnya itu. Secara statistik, menurut mereka, tak mungkin dua ayat yang mengharamkan bisa dikalahkan oleh satu ayat yang menghalalkan nikah beda agama. Bagi mereka, kata ”musyrik”, ”kafir” dan ”Ahli Kitab” adalah sinonim (satu makna), sehingga yang satu bisa membatalkan yang lain.

Ulama pertama ini pun mengacu pada tindakan Umar ibn Khattab. Ibn Katsir menceritakan bahwa ketika QS, al-Mumtahanah: 10 turun, Umar ibn Khattab langsung menceraikan dua isterinya yang masih kafir, yaitu Binti Abi Umayyah ibn Mughirah dari Bani Makhzum dan Ummu Kultsum binti Amr bin Jarwal dari Khuza’ah.

Umar pernah hendak mencambuk orang yang menikah dengan Ahli Kitab. Umar marah karena ia khawatir tindakan beberapa orang yang menikahi perempuan-perempuan Ahli Kitab itu akan diikuti umat Islam lain, sehingga perempuan-perempuan Islam tak menjadi pilihan laki-laki Islam. Namun, kemarahan Umar tak mengubah pendirian sebagian Sahabat Nabi yang tetap menikahi perempuan Ahli Kitab.

Dikisahkan, Umar pernah berkirim surat pada Khudzaifah agar yang bersangkutan menceraikan istrinya yang Ahli Kitab itu. Khudzaifah bertanya kepada Umar, ”apakah anda menyangka bahwa pernikahan dengan perempuan Ahli Kitab haram?”.

Umar menjawab, ”tidak. Saya hanya khawatir”. Menurut saya, jawaban Umar ini menunjukkan bahwa ketidak-setujuan Umar itu tak didasarkan secara sungguh-sungguh pada teks al-Qur’an, melainkan pada kehati-hatian dan kewaspadaan.

Kedua, ulama yang berpendapat bahwa keharaman menikahi orang Musyrik dan Kafir sudah dibatalkan QS, al-Maidah [5]: 5 yang membolehkan laki-laki Muslim menikahi perempuan Ahli Kitab. Para ulama berpendapat bahwa tiga ayat tersebut memang sama-sama turun di Madinah.

Akan tetapi, ayat pertama (al-Mumtahanah ayat 10 dan al-Baqarah ayat 221) lebih awal turun, sehingga dimungkinkan untuk dianulir ayat ketiga (al-Ma’idah ayat 5).

Ibn Katsir mengutip pernyataan Ibnu Abbas melalui Ali bin Abi Thalhah berkata bahwa perempuan-perempuan Ahli Kitab dikecualikan dari al-Baqarah ayat 221. Dengan perkataan lain, keharaman menikahi orang musyrik dan orang kafir seperti tertera dalam al-Baaqarah: 221 dan al-Mumtahanah: 10 telah ditakhshish (dispesifikasi) oleh al-Maidah:5.

Pendapat ini juga didukung oleh Mujahid, Ikrimah, Said bin Jubair, Makhul, al-Hasan, al-Dhahhak, Zaid bin
Aslam, dan Rabi’ bin Anas. Thabathabai berpendirian bahwa pengharaman itu hanya terbatas pada orang-orang Watsani (para penyembah berhala), dan tidak termasuk di dalamnya orang-orang Ahli Kitab.

Beberapa buku tarikh mendaftar para sahabat Nabi yang melakukan nikah beda agama, di antaranya adalah Utsman bin ‘Affan, Thalhah bin Abdullah, Khudzaifah ibn Yaman, Sa’ad ibn Abi Waqash, dan sebagainya. Menurut Ibnu Qudamah, Hudzaifah menikah dengan perempuan Majusi. Sementara menurut Muhammad Rasyid Ridla, Khudzaifah menikah bukan dengan perempuan Majusi, melainkan dengan perempuan Yahudi.

Ketiga, ulama yang membolehkan secara mutlak. Ulama terakhir ini melanjutkan argumen ulama kedua yang tak tuntas. Jika ulama kedua hanya membolehkan laki-laki Muslim menikah dengan perempuan Ahli Kitab, maka ulama terakhir ini membolehkan hukum sebaliknya; perempuan muslimah menikah dengan laki-laki Ahli Kitab.

Bagi mereka, tak ada beda antara pernikahan laki-laki muslim-perempuan Ahli Kitab dan pernikahan perempuan muslimah-laki-laki Ahli Kitab. Menurut kelompok terakhir ini, tak ada teks dalam al-Qur’an yang secara eksplisit melarang pernikahan perempuan muslimah dengan laki-laki Ahli Kitab. Bagi mereka, tidak adanya larangan itu adalah dalil bagi bolehnya pernikahan perempuaan muslimah dengan laki-laki Ahli Kitab.

Silahkan nilai tulisan ini

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